It's Been a Long Time Without You My Friend!

It’s been way too long blog readers.  I took some time off of writing any posts so that I could focus on my business, my next book and some personal issues that were hitting pretty close to home.  I woke up today and realized that my healing journey can not be complete without getting creative and writing.  I’m happy to report that I am back online.

Today is a day of big shifts and realizations.  I have made some changes that really hit home such as changing the way I operate with some people.  I am seeing that some folks don’t want to change. They want to stay stuck in their depression, worries, anxiety, unfulfiling jobs or relationships, etc.  Whatever their stories are around keeping the pain is quite honestly their business but they are getting something out of it.  It’s up to me to change my attitude towards them and not let myself get sucked into their woes.  If they don’t want to change, then why am I wasting my energy? I guess it’s what I was calling compassion or what I thought was compassion.  If I sit and listen yet again to their “story” is that compassion?  Or as I realized today, it’s actually enabling them.

Co-dependence and enabling seem to be the buzz words right now.  You can be doing these things without even realizing it.  Case in point, me this morning when talking yet again to someone who thinks they don’t need treatment for something going on in their life.  Where do I draw the line?  I did this morning. It was, okay if you don’t think you need treatment, then I will set some boundaries around how much time I spend around that person.  I struggle with that they are feeling down and maybe don’t have energy to get treatment but I have to make sure I am not going too deep into their journey as it is unhealthy for me.  I wish them luck on this path.

I am seeing more and more clearly that each and every one of us is responsible for our own journeys. There are lots of resources out there that can guide us on this course but ultimately it is up to us individually.  I am currently working with a coach who doesn’t give me the answers but does give me the tools to get those answers myself.  This is a welcome change from other folks I have worked with.  This is empowering and helps me to be my best self.  It also helps me to bring my A game to my clients to help them step into their best selves.  We teach what we need to Master.  If I didn’t put out there that I went through life “stuff” then how can I be relatable to my clients?  We are not perfect.  We all go through big “stuff” and it’s how we handle it that makes the difference between thriving in life and just surviving.

As the holidays approach, life’s big waves start to happen.  If we decide to go into this season with calmness, un-attachment and love, then we are better able to enjoy life’s pleasures.  Take back your power and use all that extra energy to have gratitude for all that this season does bring. 

“Every positive change in your life begins with a clear, unequivocal decision that you are going to either do something or stop doing something!”

Be Your Own Hero!!

At a lovely dinner last night here in Park City, I had a conversation with a good friend of mine.  We were talking about finding your purpose in life and how it feels when you just don't know what that is.  We talked around the subject and then came to the realization that you know your purpose, it's inside of you just waiting to get out.  There are quite a few folks in the world who are already living their purpose, but I would have to guess that there are more who are not.  They are stuck in jobs they don't like, relationships that aren't working and are not saying yes to their souls. Fast forward an appetizer or two, and we came up with the lovely conclusion that you do have your purpose inside of you.  It's the unlocking of steps to get you to that a-ha moment, that lovely, yummy version of yourself.  The one where you no longer feel that emptiness inside and that voice inside your head that says, "I know there is more!"

So, the inevitable question becomes how do we get there?  How do we unlock those steps?  For me it was years of workshops, coaching, therapy, etc.  It's just what I had to do.  It can get frustrating but it's that one coach who will give you the tools to get the job done yourself who will be the most valuable.  We all go to the workshops and hope that "they" give us the answers.  How many of you can relate to this?  When you make that switch to "I can do this!", the answers will flow more easily.

As I continued to talk to my dear friend, we realized that you can work on finding your passion at night while still in your day job.  Just start!  Just start with small steps and it will keep the momentum building and the energy going forward.  It's when you stop and try and re-start a few months later that you have problems getting the energy up to full speed.  Try it, just do three things a day.  Sit down and write three things a day that you want to accomplish.  The feeling of completing those three things will have you feeling so good, you will continue with the rest of that long to-do list.  Baby steps, my dear, baby steps.

It took me 50 years to finally see what my purpose here on earth was.  Some folks are blessed to find it way early and some way later than me.  It's that acceptance of knowing that it is inside of you and that you eventually will have the tools to tease it out that will make your life so much richer!

“Just don’t give up trying to do what you really want to do. Where there’s love and inspiration, I don’t think you can go wrong.” —Ella Fitzgerald

“I’ve been absolutely terrified every moment of my life and I’ve never let it keep me from doing a single thing that I wanted to do.” — Georgia O’Keefe

Until My Next Adventure,

Trish Walker

Check out my new book @ https://www.amazon.com/honey-just-getting-started-Consciously

Are you ready to say yes to your soul by shifting your perspective to create something extraordinary? I invite you to contact me via email at pwalker2650@gmail.com to discuss how I can help you to make your next chapter better than your last.

Please also follow me on my Facebook Page: Trish Walker or via Twitter (Trish Walker@50foraYear).

Finding Myself Through My Travels!

It's been a few weeks since I have made a blog post.  I was away for an extended road trip and was processing a lot of my stuff while in the car.  What do I mean by this?  I was doing a life examination and seeing where I could make some changes and what needed to go.  I'm back home and ready to rock it.  I had some huge Aha moments and some that threw me for a loop.  I highly recommend this process to anyone who feels stuck. It's a great way to get away and work on some of your "stuff". It's hard to go there, but if you want different results in your life, it's the way to do it.  I realized that you can't sit around and wait for others to change, you have to change your response to things.

Back in my "happy place" - Santa Barbara, Ca., June 2016

I'm a fan of Doreen Virtue (Google her if you aren't familiar, she's amazing!) on both Facebook and Instagram.  Doreen has some great posts just about everyday that always seem to hit me right in the head.  Today's was, "Stay out of the drama, even if for just one day!".  Wow, that's great.  I went out for a bike ride and decided to do it.  Guess what, it was amazing how many ways people tried to bring it to my handlebars.  I'll give you one example.  I had a beautiful monarch butterfly land on the front of my bike. They were all around.  I stopped to enjoy them.  A gentleman was walking by me.  I told him about the butterflies and hoped he would enjoy seeing them as well.  He looked at me and uttered, "Yeah, well this place is also filled with snakes!".  I looked at him and said, "I'm going to focus on the positive!".  That felt really good!  Butterflies vs. snakes, what will you choose?

I'm feeling really good about the future because I realized this past week that you shouldn't even go to the non-existent future.  Take one step at a time.  I was feeling overwhelmed because my book is going to be coming out here very soon.  Why was I not excited?  I was feeling overwhelmed because there is still a lot of steps between here and there.  This is when I realized to stop looking at the future, and to take it in small bites.  Case in point, make a list every day of three things (yes, just three things) to do.  I will let you know that when you feel so good about just getting those three things done, your list will grow and you will have the energy and spirit to finish it.

After driving nearly 2,500 miles, the Aha list was very long.  With my new thinking, I'm going to take that list one at a time.  As long as I do this, I will keep moving forward and my future will sort itself out.  There is a reason I am in the situation I am in right now. It's preparing me for my best self.  If I don't stop long enough and learn the lessons that are being thrown at me right now, how will I ever move forward in a positive manner. As someone wise told me last night, "Different forest, same trees!".  Basically, if I refuse to figure my "stuff" out now, history will just repeat itself.  Take that nugget and go out there and get at it!!

Dinner View at Duke's Malibu!

“You've got to find yourself first. Everything else'll follow.”  ― Charles de Lint, Dreams Underfoot

Until My Next Adventure,

P.A. Walker

Are you ready to say yes to your soul by shifting your perspective to create something extraordinary? I invite you to contact me via email at pwalker2650@gmail.com to schedule a complimentary intuitive coaching session to discuss how to make your second half of life better than your first.

Please also follow me on my Facebook Page: The Second Half or via Twitter (Patricia A. Walker@50foraYear).

The Different Sides to Santa Barbara

I have traveled to Santa Barbara several times over the last two years.  It feels like home to me.  Each trip here has me finding more and more layers to it.  This past week I was exposed to just a little more…. I was blessed to be able to experience a conference this week that rocked my world. Basically it was an energetic/business gathering.  I won't get too much into why I was there, but more into what I garnered while I was there.  For years I have been saying I wanted to volunteer at a soup kitchen, homeless shelter, etc.  However, I never made it happen.  Not really sure why, but this week I was able to take part in a group activity that truly changed my world.  Another first!

One of the nights that we were at meeting, we were told to meet at 5:00 in our conference room to find out what we would be doing.  We arrived to find bags of bread, jars of peanut butter and jelly, plus bottled water.  We quickly got down to work and assembled as a group 100 bags of sandwiches and water to pass out to the homeless population in Santa Barbara.  If anyone knows what Santa Barbara is like, you would be hard pressed to believe that such a population exists.  Not only does it, but it is pretty numerous and all around from the beach to the parks.

We set out in small groups to areas that we thought might have some folks in need of a meal.  The biggest gathering that we came to was in Alameda Park downtown.  Sure enough, we came upon many folks that were truly grateful for a sandwich or two.  We spent considerable time just connecting with the folks.  They have stories, lots of stories.  We met a young lady whose family had disowned her after her grandmother died for various reasons.  We met a man who lost everything a month ago in Michigan and was now living in a park in Santa Barbara.  He had an amazing attitude and said, "Hey, who wouldn't want to live here in such a beautiful place?'.  It truly was a mind-shift for sure.

One of the take-aways from this experience that was a huge shift for me was their attitude of we have enough.  What I mean by this is, we would try and hand them enough food for two days and they said no.  They would only take enough for one and say, we are okay for now.  Can you imagine?  These folks don't know where their next meals are coming from and they still said they had enough.  It was a huge lesson for me in abundance, being grateful and realizing that I have more than enough.

The homeless population in Santa Barbara is bigger than most people realize.  There were two gentleman who actually did a documentary about it, the actor Paul Walker and his friend Brandon Birtell.  The documentary was called Shelter.  They worked with a local therapist who was a big advocate in Santa Barbara for the homeless.  He has since retired.  Unfortunately with Paul's untimely passing and the unfavorable response of some to the movie (Paul actually received death threats while promoting it.), most folks have never heard of the documentary.

This issue of homelessness is one of huge importance.  I am so grateful that I was able to have this opportunity to spend some time with some of the homeless population in Santa Barbara.  It certainly changed my view.  I plan to look for more opportunities to help out this cause in the future.  I urge you, the readers, to seek out opportunities to help out as well.  It was amazing how giving to someone else, can give us more in terms of feeling so good about our own lives!

"I know I sound like a broken record, but 10 years ago I was living out of a garage and pan- handling, so just being a little comfortable is more than good for me. In fact, this is heaven." - Paul Walker to the Chicago Sun Times

Until My Next Adventure,

P.A. Walker

Are you ready to say yes to your soul by shifting your perspective to create something extraordinary? I invite you to contact me via email at trish@thesecondhalf.us to schedule a complimentary 30 minute consultation to discuss how we can work together to make your second half of life better than your first.

Please also follow me on my Facebook Page: The Second Half or via Twitter (Patricia A. Walker@50foraYear).

From Chaos to Calm!

Chaos.  Yes chaos.  That word kept coming up for me today.  "I am so busy!"  I keep noticing people saying this.  I am so busy I can't…..  People filled my message box with the list of things that they were doing in a day.  I stepped back and for once, decided that instead of getting frustrated or annoyed, I would detach and see what message was being sent to me.  It took me all day to realize, but this was exactly how I used to be.  Busy, busy, busy.  People tend to think that if their days are filled to the brim and they can tell the word they are busy, it looks good.  It looks like they are important or have this amazing life.  I know, I was one of them. Today I decided to just sit on this and see what came up.  I have been spending a lot of time lately just getting in touch with my feelings and figuring out what messages I am being lead to.  I know, this might sound all woo woo, but guess what it makes me feel so much more grounded and present.  Wasn't I trying to accomplish this for the longest time?  Yes, my dear, I think that I have finally gotten the message.  The first for today is, just be still.  Be present.

I recently met with a relative who was telling me how much travel he and his spouse were doing.  Caribbean Islands for the holidays, Mexico for a week, here and then there.  My first question I asked him was, do you two ever sit still?  He gave me the weirdest look.  Do you ever just sit and be?  What are you running from?  I can have the nerve to say this because I was once a "runner".  Let's book an exotic vacation, be happy for a week and then guess what?  Your life at home is still the same. Do not get me wrong.  I love travel, I crave travel.  I also think that travel is one of the best things you can do for your life.  See new things, experience new cultures, and sip margaritas at the beach.  However, if you are running from something, stay still long enough to address that so you can go out on your adventures with a clear heart, clear mind and know that you will come home to that same feeling.

As I stepped onto my yoga mat this morning, I brought the word chaos with me. Does that sound as strange to you as it did to me?  I decided to bring this word because it came up several times before I even got to the studio.  So why dear Universe were you bringing me this word to meditate on today?  I came to the conclusion that it was officially time to calm down, be still and sit in my own chaos to see where changes need to be made.  Another aha moment for my 50.4.50!  Take the time to stop and smell the roses.  Take the time to spend quality time with your child before he is driving away to college.  Take the time to treasure every day.  It's a gift that can be taken away at any given moment.

I love the way the Universe works.  I love the way that it gently (sometimes more than gently) guides you to see what it is that it wants you to see.  They say that the best coaches are the ones that give you the tools to use to help yourself.  Today the Universe did just that.  I ask you, the reader, where in your life you can skim down the chaos and appreciate that the experience I had today may speak to you on some level?  Let's all put down our phones, gaze out the window and take a deep breath!  Enjoy the gentle moment and bring that forward into your own lives.

I am so busy doing nothing... that the idea of doing anything - which as you know, always leads to something - cuts into the nothing and then forces me to have to drop everything. - Jerry Seinfeld

Until my next adventure,

P.A. Walker

Dear Wonder Woman, I Am Officially Resigning!

The first for today is about finally finding the courage to set up some boundaries. It takes a lot of courage, strength and detachment to set up boundaries with those loved ones who suck your energy, those people around you that suck your energy and life in general. This week I came upon quite a few folks who were going through some intense energies. They all had one thing in common, people were truly annoying the crap out of them. I am a true believer of loving everyone the same, but sometimes people just really push the limits on that one. It was with this in mind, that I realized that it was time for me to find the strength to set boundaries.

This week I had two phone calls that really angered me. Why did they anger me, because I gave my precious time away to people that just didn’t respect it. They had their own agenda, and did not come up for air to ask me about what was going on with me. Again, I realized that this is my fault. I do not set boundaries. This has finally taken it’s toll. I am ready to take off my cape and forge ahead in a way that is healthy for me.

Why are we so afraid of saying no? Why are we so afraid to not set boundaries with those around us? Several reasons pop into my mind: what will people think (oh geez, there goes that line of thinking again), we cannot say no or the old FOMO = Fear of Missing Out.

It truly has been an empowering week for me. This boundary lesson got me thinking about other themes that run concurrent in my life. Why all of a sudden does this boundary thing bother me so much? Why do I all of a sudden have the strength to set them? I truly believe that because of the healing path I am on, I am acquiring more and more tools to help me handle these situations in a different manner than I ever have before.

Today I ran into two dear friends serendipitously. It couldn’t have worked out any better even if I had planned it for months. These two lovely souls didn’t know each other but by the end of the two hour chance meeting, they were chatting like old friends. I love that, I love to see that my tribe can expand beyond me and those like-minded folks can connect. It also helped me to see that I was not the only one that was having this boundary issue come up. We had a lot in common today and it helped cement for me that I was moving in the right direction.

I think that we spend a lot of time blaming ourselves for past mistakes. Who doesn’t? It’s human nature. What I saw today is that I realized that I sometimes slip back but I am correcting my course a lot faster to get back in aligment with my authentic self. I love how the Universe helps us out.

“We change our behavior when the pain of staying the same becomes greater than the pain of changing. Consequences give us the pain that motivates us to change.”  ― Henry Cloud

Until My Next Adventure,

P.A. Walker

My Town Through New Eyes

The other day I had the awesome opportunity to see my hometown through new eyes.  My first for this post is that I decided to become a tourist in a town I have lived in for 15 years but have started to take for granted and actually complain about (more on that later). A friend of mine came into Park City for the very first time.  She traveled to Utah from Northern California with her 6 year old son whom I have never met before.  I loved this kid from the get-go. He is an old soul in a young person.  What a beautiful outlook this kid has on life.  He does things with gusto, no complaints and definitely a lot of boy adrenaline.  After just 10 minutes with him, I said to myself, why am I not living like this?  Let's do this, let's have a fun day.

We started our day by having a late breakfast at Squatter's Brewery on the main drag in Park City.  (www.squatters.com).  Squatter's has several locations.  I have eaten here a lot but never had breakfast there.  I would say it was your normal fare.  Nothing amazing but once you added a side of bacon, the rest just seemed to not matter.

Now that we were full, I suggested to my little friend and his mom that we head up to Utah Olympic Park.  Utah Olympic Park is an amazing venue where several of the events were held during the Salt Lake 2002 Olympics.  There is a museum there that has quite a few of the items from these Olympics.  There are also plenty of fun activities in the park including zip lining, bobsled rides, and a ropes adventure course.  (http://utaholympiclegacy.org)

D. is an avid Nascar fan.  You could ask this kid about any driver and he could tell you their car number, stats, etc.  To make the outing enticing to a 6 year old, I told him that they had bobsleds at the park where the drivers did upwards of 70+ miles per hour.  My sidekick's eyes grew big when he asked if he could ride one.  Alas, the track was closed and you have to be 18 to do this.  He wasn't sidetracked because we were able to do a simulated one inside the museum.  You sit in a chairlift chair and are faced with a big screen that shows the bobsled track.  You feel like you are actually going down it because the chair bumps and fake snow rains down upon you.  What made it for me were the belly laughs coming out of him.  He just had that pure, child-like giggle that took me out of the real world for a few hours and put me into the shoes of someone experiencing Park City for the first time ever. How cool was that?

Next up on the agenda was picking my own son up early from school.  With D. in hand, I went into my kid's classroom to surprise him and tell him that we were heading up to Main Street and the home of the world's best ice cream (www.javacow.com).  We have been in here countless times, but never tire of the unique flavors.  My favorite is Cherry Springer, a delicious blend of dark chocolate chips, vanilla ice cream and pieces of cherries.  Divine!!

After walking around the touristic Main Street area, we headed to Vinto's Pizzeria for some of their amazing limeade and to share a pizza.  Vinto is our go-to pizzeria in the Main Street area. Being from New Jersey originally, I am a bit of a pizza snob.  Vinto's is not East Coast quality but it certainly keeps me happy.  (www.vinto.com)

The day went by extremely fast.  I realized at the end of the day how much fun it was to look at my town with fresh eyes.  We all enjoyed the day.  As I stated before, I am getting a bit jaded on my hometown.  It's all of a sudden become the place to move.  It went from a quiet little ski resort to a big deal.  The traffic is getting worse, the people not so nice and the house prices are booming (okay, that last one is a good thing since I own a little piece of paradise).  By spending the day as a tourist for a change, it gave me a new perspective.  I realized that folks spend thousands of dollars to come to my town for a week's ski vacation or a long weekend.  I live here.  I can cherish and enjoy it each and every day.  I am now making the vow to have a little vacation in each day.

"My goal is to build a life I don't need a vacation from." - R. Hill

Until My Next Adventure,

P.A. Walker

Signs from the Universe

As I sat down this morning to write this blog post, it occurred to me that I had no clue what I was going to write about today. I just knew it would flow through me. This is a first of sorts. I liken it to just putting it out there. I am trusting the universe to take over the reins and give me a voice. Today has been unique. I have had an outpouring of phone calls and messages from people that I haven’t heard from in a long time. These are folks that I have chosen to take a step back from. They didn’t fit into what I have been moving forward into. They are not bad people, just not on the same path as I.  I was questioning why all of sudden did they all reach out on the same day?

As the voice mails and emails appeared , I thought to myself that I should sit and figure out what was going on. What is the pop quiz that the universe was putting to me this first day of the week? I finally got it. I realized after seeing several posts pop up on facebook and sitting on what was happening, it is about going within. Why were these messages so bothersome to me? Why was it irritating to me that someone close to me was once again self-sabotaging himself? I pulled out the proverbial “mirror” and said, why was I irked? It hit me. I am irked because I made the conscious decision to be irked. I was spending my precious energy trying to figure out the behaviors of others. Do you know what this did for me? It gave me the luxury of time spent away from my dreams and visions. If I spent it on others, then I wouldn’t have to go out into that uncomfortable world of the unknown.

When I realized all of this, I kind of got a little excited. I realized that I had a choice here. I could continue going down that path, or I could forge ever forward to do something that felt uncomfortable to me. I could move one step ahead today to get myself closer to my dreams. I could do a huge thing today to get even closer. Bottom line was that it was all in my power.  There are times where, of course, the behavior of others will still affect me. It’s only natural, but what I can do is be there for them with compassion. I can ask them, what would playing a bigger game look like to you?

I ask you the reader, if you have had a situation that you keep re-visiting to get away from the bigger picture. If you do, what will things be like in one year, five years, ten years if you don’t take action now?

"We are our choices." - Jean-Paul Sartre

Until my next adventure,

P.A. Walker

It's As If Someone Turned the Light On.

Today I woke up to the news that yet another earthquake had hit Nepal.  This time the 7.3 earthquake was 42 miles from Namche Bazaar, close to Mt. Everest.  I realized with a start that this is the area that my niece's friend Katie had been trekking in.  I had a Facebook message from Katie not two days ago that she was fine and was staying there until she left to go to Khatmandu in two weeks.   My heart sank when I realized that today she might not be so safe.  I immediately took to social media to see if I could find an answer.  It came via text message an hour or so later, that Katie was indeed safe for now. My first in all of this is that I realized truly for the first time, how quickly a life can be taken.  In the blink of an eye an earthquake could hit and take dozens of lives.  With this mindset, I proceeded to go about my day just a little differently.  I had a new purpose.  I realized that today could be my last day on earth.  If so, did I want to spend it doing meaningless things?  Did I want to spend it watching reality television (not that I make a habit of that).  No, I answered, I want to make every minute count.

Sitting at my desk this morning, I realized that I had an overwhelming urge to help out someone.  I didn't know what form this would take, but quickly realized that it would be one step in the right direction to send a donation to a Go Fund Me Page that I have been reading about on Facebook.  My amazing Reiki teacher Carol Wilson is on the ground working tirelessly in Nepal. Carol landed in Khatmandu just five minutes before the first big earthquake hit.  She could have made the choice to turn around and go home, but instead she is staying to help out with relief efforts.  Below I have attached a link to her Go Fund Me Page.  It has a beautiful video that her kids put together for her for Mother's Day.  What kind, selfless kids she has.  They definitely learned that from their mom.

[embed]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gZ6GoIrVP8I[/embed]

Carol's page is http://www.gofundme.com/ubfcsg.

I know it sounds trite to say life has changed for me in this instance, but I keep getting this feeling that in some ways it has.  I have made a deep decision to make some changes and will act on them now.  It's selfish of me to not use this one beautiful life I have been given to give my gifts to the world.  What that looks like might not be so clear right now, but it is time to start moving in that direction and not be afraid to put those gifts out there.  How many people has Carol directly affected by using her gifts to the world?  It may be ten or thousands, but if she didn't have the courage to use her gifts right now in Nepal, the world would be a different place for those affected by this earthquake.

I urge you, the reader, to take some time today and see what changes you might need to instill in your life.  Maybe you are in complete alignment with your purpose.  If so, I applaud you and commend you that you are there.  However, if you are not in alignment, I know the feeling.  I also will think of you as I am making my own strides.  It's hard to put that first foot on the steps, but just imagine what we can do if we keep moving forward!!

God bless all the people affected by these terrible earthquakes.  Let's pray together that they all find peace sooner rather than later!

“Faith is taking the first step even when you can’t see the whole staircase." - M.L. King Jr.

Until my next adventure in life,

P.A. Walker

Love and Acceptance

I was lying in bed this Monday morning getting a little sad. I realized that I did not have some sort of fun adventure planned for this week. It is going to be a week full of work, spring cleaning and being the Mom taxi that I am. However, as I was out on my morning walk, I had the clear realization that life’s adventures and new things (aha moments) are not just about fun, travel, etc. They also can come in the form of a life lesson that sets you up for future greatness. I was joined on my walk this morning by my husband. Today is our 15^th wedding anniversary. We were reminiscing about the last 15 years and all the ups and downs that we have had. We are currently in a pattern in our relationship where we are working on ourselves. We have realized that in order to move forward in a positive and loving way to each other, that it was time to step back and take care of ourselves. This has come in the form of therapy, energy work, yoga, mediation, life coaching and several other modalities. It’s been a slow process, but one that seems to be moving in a forward and positive direction.

What brought up the aha moment was that we were discussing a family member that we were both getting frustrated with. We know deep in our hearts that his indecisions and fear hold him back from living his true potential. It’s been a source of frustration for years. However, today I had a moment, for my first time ever, where I stopped and said, “I was taught the difference between what I could and could not control!” It’s taken me years of self-work to do this, yet this family member has not done this at all. He has made the conscious choice to stay stuck in old limiting beliefs and patterns.

I turned the conversation around to, “Why do we spend so much energy on worrying about this person?” It’s because we are not taking that energy and putting it on our own journey. It’s super easy to put your attention on someone else so you don’t have to take care of your own issues. I will go a few steps forward and then revert back to this old pattern of “worrying and trying to fix” someone else. How convenient!  This takes my time away from me and makes me think I am using it for a valid reason!

Today was a great first for me. I was able to realize that I was doing that. I also saw for the first time that it is time to let this family member live his own life. He is on his own path, we just have to accept and love him. Here is a quote I heard today and I believe it is from AA:

"And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing or situation — some fact of my life — unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment."

What aha moments have you come up with today? Would love to hear your stories!

Until my next adventure,

P.A. Walker